Feeling kinda dirty, I am. You might ask, “Have ya showered?” and I’ll say, “Fuck yea, I showered. What kind of man you think I am? Have I showered? Of course, I showered! Have you showered?”
What’s behind this dirty feeling? Well if you really want to know, I’ll tell you. Yup, I sure fucking will. You can just sit back, take off your blouse or trousers, whatever you got on and I’ll be happy to tell you. Get yourself all roused up and such. What rouses you? What makes you so wet or hard that you can barely think of anything business-related? Granny Smith apples? A sweater chewed up by moths? Fat men tossing corn at pigs? Whatever the hell it might be, think of it. Stare at it. Do to it with your mind, finger or tongue as you will. Feels nice, does it? Do it some more. Do it till exhaustion.
Back to what makes me feeling so dirty…is nothing really. Just wanted to get your attention. Wanted to see what would happen if I took you somewhere you’ve always wanted to go. Hope you had a nice journey. That’ll be fifty dollars, please, you sexually defunct lunatic. Make the check out to Harry Trulo. Thirty-eight twenty-one Bronco Road. Rochester, NY. One four six oh four.